A Short Bestiary of "The Life and Adventures of Santa Claus"

"The Life and Adventures of Santa Claus" by L. Frank Baum is an adventure I read every year these days, and I was struck by how well some of the descriptions of immortals and their foes would translate to an old-school RPG. So here they are. It's public domain, so read it yourself and write your own monster stats if you disagree, Merry Christmas.

As always, images from the original 1920's book when available, and Rankin & Bass when not. 

Not included, though interesting, are the Water Sprites, Sleep Fays, Sound Imps, Wind Demons, and Light Elves.

Ryls

 

HD 1 AC none Thorns 1
Move Normal Int Low Morale Normal
Wants protect plants, destroy ravagers

Little first cousins to the nymphs, who watch over flowers and plants. They are merry and light-hearted, loving laughter. Their king lives in a distant meadow of gay flowers and luscious fruits.

Each attends a particular type of flower and takes its color for its name and simple garb. (The Yellow Ryl tends the buttercups, for example.)

Gifts: Can bring food, and paint the color of their plant.

Fairies

HD 2 AC as chain (flitting) Golden Wand deflect
Move Fast, flight Int High Morale High
Wants protect mankind, destroy tempters

Dressed in white gauze with rainbow-hued wings and golden wands. They are usually invisible and unknown to mortals. They honor a great queen who protects a magical pool which grants beauty to those who bathe in it.

Golden Wand: Each turn, a fairy can reduce the damage from one attack by 2d4. The attacker takes the same amount as the damage flows back to them (but no more than the attack could have caused). Multiple fairies working together can turn back dragon breath. 

Gifts: Can bring cloth and tools. 

Knooks

 

HD 3+1 AC as leather (gnarled) Spear 1d6
Move Normal Int Normal Morale Brave
Wants protect beasts, destroy monstrosities

Old and worn and crooked, anxious and rough, gray beards and scowling brows. They love courage, and are gruff but friendly. Knooks are known by names like "Will" and "Peter". Their great king lives in a distant jungle.

Each band are particular to one woods, but they share a secret language of whistles by which friendship is known. They can teleport creatures between their woods if all parties are willing and friendly.

Stinging Gnats: Once per day a knook can set a swarm of stinging gnats against a foe or recalcitrant beast. The target is blinded and slowed and cannot concentrate. Any area damage destroys the gnats, but damages the target as well. Submersion or strong winds may help.

Gifts: Gather and work (dead) wood and leather from animals that died of old age.

Nymphs

HD 4 AC as chain (wooden flesh) Ash Switch transmute
Move Normal Int Normal Morale High
Wants protect trees, destroy defiers

Tree colored, slender, dressed in oak-leaf green and sandals. They are curious and proud.

Cause Fear: In defense of forests and trees, a nymph can cause 2d4 HD of creatures that can see her to save or flee in fear.

Ash Switch: A creature struck by a nymph's ash switch has its speed reduced by a category. Anything rendered immobile by this effect is transmuted into a clod of dirt.

Gifts: A nymph can seal a dwelling against unwanted incursions.

Awgwas

 

HD 6 AC as chain (huge, tough) Stone d10
Move Slow Int Average Morale Proud
Wants tempt mortals to mischief, become king

They were of gigantic stature and had coarse, scowling countenances which showed plainly their hatred of all mankind. They possessed no consciences whatever and delighted only in evil deeds.

Their homes were in rocky, mountainous places, from whence they sallied forth to accomplish their wicked purposes.

The one of their number that could think of the most horrible deed for them to do was always elected the King Awgwa, and all the race obeyed his orders.

Limited Invisibility: Invisible to mortals, but not immortals.

Tempt Mortals: Whisper in a mortal's ear to give them advantage on their next check or attack to a petty, cruel, or quarrelsome action.

Bat-Winged Demons from Patalonia

HD 3 AC as leather (flapping) Immiserate d6 morale
Move Normal flight Int Average Morale High
Wants flap through the air spreading misery

Three-Eyed Giants of Tatary

HD 8 AC as plate (gigantic, thick walls of flesh) Slam x3 d8
Move Slow Int Average Morale Brave
Wants fight!

Goozzle-Goblins

HD 1 AC none Sword-Talons d6
Move Normal Int Average Morale High
Wants flay flesh from bones

Wherever a goozle-goblin dies, a thistle will grow.

Books Completed November 2022

I worked too much this month, but still managed to read a bit.

 

 

The Song of Roland, translated by Frederick Goland - Another one pulled from my wife's history master's bookcase, though she has no recollection of owning this or reading it. I would swear it was her copy--there's notes about wanting a dog and getting a power wheelchair and calling out all the whatever might pass for romantic moments in the text, but she'd also sooner put a knife through her hand than write in a book so I guess I have to believe her.

Goland's introduction is a text in itself. An efficient primer of French pre-history with a summary of the song, and then a really gripping few pages of how a modern reader can try to understand the nigh-mythic history among the "religious time" the song lays out. I read The Bright Ages earlier this year and that was an important primer to this concept. Then we whiplash to a lesson on poetic meter that I tried to carry forward into my reading but, hey, sometimes medieval French syllabaries don't carry into modern English perfectly.

 

Now, the song itself. I read it in two minds. As a D&D player, I cast my mind back a bit to the 70s, and earlier, where this might be a place you could get heroic two-handed swords (repeatedly) shearing through shields and skulls and hauberks. You can worry about supply lines! You can be operatic! The oliphant! The linens and silks strewn under the bowers for war councils! Really, if you can divorce yourself from the slaughter, the imagery is lovely.

 

But it's also a propaganda text. It's about the creation of a state and the glory of dying for your lord, who will be so very sad for your sacrifice. But now that you've martyred yourself, he's free (and obligated) to abduct the heathen queen you've liberated. Thousands of people die in "glory", but Charlemagne gets to be great!

 

Horses and swords and shields all get cool names though!

 

The Three Imposters and Other Stories, by Arthur Machen - I started reading this in October, in line with Halloween goals. For whatever reason, though I'd read this a couple times before, this collection really shone this year for whatever reason.

Now, I could write a whole post about each section of this book, and I started to, but there are only so many hours. Here's what stands out: The whiplash of each story's plodding Victorian pacing and the sudden, shearing terror that cuts through the moments of revelation.

Here again we have the impossible drug from a weird chemist formula, btw.

I wish I was a little better tracking characters across stories. "Inspector" Dyson is here several times, and I think the joke is that he's worthless but lucky? Not sure, I'm bad at this.

There's a wordy introduction by Joshi here too but eh, this guy.

That poor man with the spectacles. Should have shaved.

Atlantis and Other Lost Cities, by Rob Shone, illustrated by Jim Eldridge - This is just a kids' book I found in a little free library, but look at this cover. This cover is awesome, if I were 11 when I found this I would be obsessed with lost cities all my life.

https://i.ebayimg.com/images/g/2fEAAOSw0Z1fqKrp/s-l1600.jpg

 

The Goon Library Volume 2, by Eric Powell -  Let's read more The Goon! It's like 80% great and 20% embarrassing!